I Dream of Heaven

Last night I had a dream. I dreamt that I was carried to Heaven. Happily, I said goodbye to the people in the room with me. I gathered no luggage. I made no lists. I took no thought nor care for what I was leaving behind.

I only took flight.

Once my feet left the ground, I didn’t look back. I was all smiles and laughs as God’s gravity pulled me higher and higher into the sky. And I flew through the clouds, past the stars and over the galaxies all the way home where my Father greeted me like royalty.

It was the best night.

I didn’t want to wake up. I laid there in bed for a few moments still smiling. I started thanking God. I could not remember the last time I actually awakened from my sleep, happy.

This dream was a lesson to me. With all of the ugliness in the world, from prejudices to the hot button topic of the day— politics, we Christians forget that none of it matters. When we leave, we will not think nor care about what happened yesterday. We will only focus on one subject, God.

And, isn’t that what we are to focus on while we are here anyway?

Yes, I know it’s terribly hard. My mind is constantly filled with my personal problems and those of my friends. I spend so much time asking God to do things that I forget to say “thank you”. But this morning, I made another deal with myself.

I will try harder to keep my mind on heavenly things, remembering that this troublesome world is only a pit stop home.

 If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God. Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth. Colossians 3:1-2

The Bible tells us that we will have perfect peace if our minds are focused on God.

Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee.

Isaiah 26:3

That, my sweet brothers and sisters, is so very true. For a few blissful moments, when I awakened from my dream, I cared nothing nor anyone except seeing my Father.

Grace and peace,

Blessings and love,

I Hate You With The Love of Christ

I love the South.  I love it for its natural beauty, warm client, and for the most part its culture.

But, a part of me hates the South, not its people but that secret semi-hidden culture, the one that has never acknowledged racial equality, especially in personal relationships.

I have dated outside of my race. I am open about it. Why shouldn’t I be? Some of the men have been Southern. A few I loved. A few loved me. But I noticed a pattern in most of these relationships. Some families, a few black, mostly white, have a special rule when it comes to dating here in the South.

You can be friends but never date.

You can have sex but never fall in love.

This rule has been the demise of a few of my personal relationships. I know why this ends something potentially good but I will never understand it.

A person who breaks this rule risks everything. They could lose their family, business and friends. By going against what is socially acceptable, they risk becoming an outcast.

You’re probably thinking: Is this 1950?

Yeah, my sentiments exactly.

I was sad with the ending of each relationship, not only because I lost another love but also because people can’t or won’t accept each other for their character. They vainly cannot see past the color of their skin.

Part of me wanted to hate my suitors for not standing up for what they truly believe and not breaking that cycle of hatred and prejudice. Part of me understood that it is a lot to ask to be that brave soul who finally tells the truth.

But I wonder…

I wonder what kind of heaven these people think they’re going to.

I wonder how they will answer when God asks if they loved everyone.

How will they explain the exceptions?

I wonder if they will even go to Heaven.

Yes, most of these people say they are Christian. There are some in the pulpit, preaching and teaching love. But, they would never speak to their daughter again if she brought home a black man to marry. If Jesus shows no preference, who are you to do so? (Acts 10:34)

There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus. Galatians 3:28

For years, my parents were stuck in this thinking. They were guilty of making distinctions among themselves as it is written in James 2. I remember my mom telling me that “the Bible said to love them; but it didn’t say fall in love with them”. I always thought it was an ignorant thing to say. And, I never found that verse.

I wonder how could they? How they say they love God, say they are Christian and hate someone solely because they look the way God made them? Thank God she repented before she died. My father had a change of heart shortly after. They finally understood and trusted in scripture like Galatians 3:28.

My parents, like so many, twisted the scripture. The love of Christ is not conditional. His love for his creation is without prejudice. He commands the same of us.

If ye fulfil the royal law according to the scripture, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself, ye do well: James 2:8

My question is: If the Holy Spirit truly lives in you, why is there so much hatred? Can the Holy Spirit dwell in a hatred filled environment? To quote the Apostle Paul, “God forbid”!

I don’t hate anyone. I hate the practice. In fact, my heart breaks because they are all victims, blinded by the lie. It will always be my prayer that we learn to love each other and turn a blind eye to the lie that has been passed on for decades and continues to be passed on, yet poisoning another generation.

Who will break the cycle?

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:32

Dance Like Nobody’s Watching

Recently, a friend I’ve known for a while “chastised” me for “dancing” to secular music. I allowed her to talk but I stopped listening after a few seconds. We’ve had this conversation before and it was obvious neither one of us had changed our position.  I am a pretty passive person these days. So, I kept my thoughts to myself as she babbled on in complete bondage. But, what I wanted to say was this:

Take a look at your DVR recordings or your movie purchases. What’s the difference? Why cast the stone? This is what irritates me about religion. It keeps you in bondage even when Christ has set you free with his BLOOD. HIS HUMAN LIFE. You can’t settle a debt any better than this. This is the ultimate sin (if there is a such thing). Rejecting God’s atonement for ALL sin insisting you can do a better job. Foolish child! It’s sad that so many of these self righteous, sanctimonious, holier than thou, ‘I am God’s chosen because I can recite scripture and I count my sins everyday, people are so very LOST. My dear sister/brother, revisit 1 Cor. 15:3…where Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures; John 8:36…if the Son shall make you free, you are free indeed and (you know this one by heart) John 3:16. What’s worse than going to hell? Going and being totally surprised. Note: Your deeds are not the key, it’s your faith.

I didn’t bother ‘casting my pearls to swine’, brothers and sisters. I just rolled my eyes and said a quick prayer for her as I do for myself. I asked for wisdom and understanding of the Bible. I pray that you all know that God looks beyond that thick skin of ours. He speaks to our heart and soul. No relationship can be any deeper.

I wouldn’t be surprised at all if we got to Heaven and the Lord Jesus himself wanted to dance in celebration of our glorious welcome home.

Grace and peace  Blessings and Love.

Driving Purpose in Life

Tags

Jesus Christ, purpose driven life

It’s been a while. I know. I could say life gets in the way. I’ve been very busy. But these are just excuses.
Life.
Our lives should be an extension of the life of Christ.
When I heard this at church on Sunday, I started to make a mental, self-absorbed inventory of my life. What do I do? What do I don’t? And of yes, the ever coveted…What would Jesus do?
Can we truly live up to the life of Christ? By the end of our first year on earth, we probably had already fallen short. So how do we reconcile?
Simple. We cannot.
What does it mean to be an extension of Christ? How does one accomplish this?
Purpose.
Why are here? What is our purpose in life? Mark Twain said it best when wrote: “The two most important days of your life is the day you are born and the day you find out why.”
The ‘why’ allow us to become that extension.
We strive to live a life pleasing to God. As hard as it may be, we fight daily. We don’t live for ourselves.

1 Corinthians 6:19-20 Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.

We live for a purpose. Whatever gift God has given you, it should be used within the body of Christ.

1 Corinthians 10:33 Even as I please all men in all things, not seeking mine own profit, but the profit of many, that they may be saved.

We try to keep our minds, bodies and spirits as clean as possible to please the Lord and to encourage others. In this way, we attempt to be an extension of Jesus Christ, a part of His body.

Romans 12:1-5
I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned. For as in one body we have many members, and the members do not all have the same function, so we, though many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another.

So, the Sunday message followed me all day. It’s still haunting my mind actually. I thought about my life and how people pre-judge me because of my past choices. It hurts. I was a teenage mother and now divorced with three children. For the rest of my life, this will be my identity to most of the world. How unfair! What about my heart? What about my walk with Christ? What about the ‘good’ things I do?
Doesn’t matter.
Thank Jesus for his grace and mercy. This is one that the world will never be able to comprehend. All they will ever see is what I have done. But my Father sees me and only me, as an extension of himself. That is why we stay focused on the blessed hope with our mind of heavenly things. Focus, instead, on our purpose. Purpose drives us to keep going. As the minister at church said, it motivates us to fight! Every one of us needs a reason to get up in the morning. What is yours?

The Pope Said WHAT?

Tags

Bible, christianity, Encouragement, Love, Pope Francis, religion, salvation

Last week the ever “progressive” Pope was in the news yet again spouting his so-called wisdom to the world. For a few seconds, his comments surprised me.

“When we read about Creation in Genesis, we run the risk of imagining God was a magician, with a magic wand able to do everything. But that is not so.” (Pope Francis)

Then I was reminded that this man like countless others, is completely clueless. His wisdom is foolishness. Period.

  For seeing that in the wisdom of God the world through its wisdom knew not God, it was God’s good pleasure through the foolishness of the preaching to save them that believe.  1 Corinthians 1:21

I don’t claim to know very much about the Catholic church. But, I do know that anyone who does not preach Jesus Christ crucified (Ephesians 2: 8-9) as the gospel of our salvation, is lost and bound for hell.

Think about the millions of people who place their faith in the words of men. They hold all of these degrees and certifications that allegedly proves they are knowledgeable.

But, what do they really know?

Without, Jesus, the Power of God, there is no knowledge.

Pope Francis says God cannot be expected to wave a magic wand to create things. Perhaps this man studied his own version of Genesis. God needs the help of no one. He speaks and it is so. The end.

Brothers and sisters, the world continues to show us that we need to stay grounded in the word of God. We need to take advantage of our divine appointments. Share our wisdom with the world. So you have no formal education? So what. You have something better, no best.

²⁵ Because the foolishness of God is wiser than men; and the weakness of God is stronger than men.

²⁶ For behold your calling, brethren, that not many wise after the flesh, not many mighty, not many noble, are called:

²⁷ but God chose the foolish things of the world, that he might put to shame them that are wise; and God chose the weak things of the world, that he might put to shame the things that are strong;

²⁸ and the base things of the world, and the things that are despised, did God choose, yea and the things that are not, that he might bring to nought the things that are:

²⁹ that no flesh should glory before God.

³⁰ But of him are ye in Christ Jesus, who was made unto us wisdom from God, and righteousness and sanctification, and redemption:

³¹ that, according as it is written, He that glorieth, let him glory in the Lord. 1 Corinthians 1:25-31

We know God! He knows us! We have his wisdom! Why not use it?

But first, we must come to together. Preach in unison the gospel of Jesus (1 Corinthians 1:13). I know what you’re thinking. That’s hard if not impossible. Do you know what I say to that?

With God ALL things are possible.

Use me, Lord.

I’m sad to say that I can understand how easy it is for one’s heart to turn to stone. We live in a cold world. It’s so cold that the very fact is a cliché. But it is sadder to know that even your brothers and sisters in Christ are even icier.

I’ll admit sometimes I wish I could just use people for what I need or want and keep it moving. It happens so often, it looks easy. But my conscience, my heart, the Holy Spirit in me, won’t allow me to so. I feel guilty just thinking about it.

I’m far from perfect. Trust me; I have done things in which I am ashamed. But like so many of my brothers and sisters, I have a love for people. I want to help them. Nourish them. I’d give my all and my last if I could. God knows that’s the truth. Anyone who knows me can witness to this fact.

But I wonder how do we get so wrapped up on our flesh that we forget to love each other, unconditionally.

Agape love.

I have had recent cases where people I loved, brothers and sisters in the Lord, who could have helped me but refused. But with the same hand, reached out for my assistance, vanishing after there need was filled.

It happens too often. And good clean hearts can easily turn into stone with this kind of treatment. I considered taking on this attitude.

“From now on, I’m looking out for me and only me. No one is going to mistake my kindness for weakness ever again,” I said to myself.

These thoughts were fueled by pain and heartbreak. I knew it was wrong. But God how do I avoid people like this? How do I tell the difference being naivety and charity?

I came across some verses that helped. They blessed and refilled my heart. When I read them, I truly felt sorry for the “users”. I hope it blesses you too.

 Bless them that curse you, and pray for them which despitefully use you. Luke 6:28

For the Lord taketh pleasure in his people: he will beautify the meek with salvation. Psalms 149:4

Before destruction the heart of man is haughty, and before honour is humility. Proverbs 18:12

Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time 1 Peter 5:6

But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; Matthew 5:44

 

 

I loathe when people use others. It’s one of those things that anger me. It just breaks my heart. However, here’s the kicker.

I want to be used.

But, only by my Father, the Lord Jesus Christ. These days, I have a new prayer. I ask the Lord to use me in any way that He wants to use me. I am His. I only ask for strength and courage to do His Will.

 Will you join me? Perhaps, by faith, we can put a dent in the cycle.

Grace and peace. Blessings and love.

Love Never Felt So Good

Greetings my brothers and sisters in Christ!

I am in LOVE…with the lyrics in this song, Break Every Chain.

There is power in the name of Jesus
to break every chain.

There’s an army rising up.
To break every chain, break every chain, break every chain.

I hear the chains falling.

There is power in the name of Jesus
to break every chain.

Not too long ago, I fell ill and into a depression so deep, I was ready to end my life. My life had been taken over by the pressures and pleasures of this world. I worked nonstop. I was fighting a chronic physical illness. I barely had time for my family. In between the two I tried to squeeze in time for a romantic relationship that was doomed from the start. In short, my life was sheer chaos.

I neglected to attend my weekly Bible study. Church on Sunday? Nope. I was at work. My morning prayers were replaced with Insanity workouts, the gym and Spotify. I barely picked up the Bible or opened my Bible app. My spiritual life, as I knew it, was fading away. But I didn’t notice.

Meanwhile, I began to feel drained, sick and sad. I couldn’t explain why. I had battled depression before, so I knew the warning signs. True to form, I was too busy to truly acknowledge them. I mentioned it in passing to friends. I got the same answer from each of them: You’re doing too much. Slow down.

But I couldn’t.

I felt that I had to be the super being my family needed. I had to help with legal cases, emotional issues, custody issues, financial problems. I chose to carry that weight on my own not realizing that it was weighing down. I had unequivocally tried to replace God, attempting to carry these loads. My life was in danger. But again, I didn’t notice.

Colossians 2
18 Let no man beguile you of your reward in a voluntary humility and worshipping of angels, intruding into those things which he hath not seen, vainly puffed up by his fleshly mind,

2 Corinthians 11:3 – But I fear, lest by any means, as the serpent beguiled Eve through his subtilty, so your minds should be corrupted from the simplicity that is in Christ.

Meanwhile, my body, my mind and my spirit weakened. Things in my life began to fall apart. I was loosing the tight grip I thought I had on everything. I was plagued with migraines, my strength was barely there. I was becoming a skeleton.

Finally, I realized something was missing. I tried to pray. But my prayers felt empty and rehearsed. I tried to worship the Lord but there was no satisfaction. The close, intimate relationship that I had with my Father was gone.

I was lost.

Those whispers that I used to hear in my ear every day; that soft still voice, that gifted me with encouragement and love, had fallen silent. I saw no visions. I dreamed no dreams.  It was all replaced with a taunting sibilance growing louder in my mind.

I was broken.

For days I was on my knees crying out to God, begging Him to come back. I felt, I heard, I saw nothing. Desperate to hear from my Father, I continued to pray. One morning, I heard something new, an idea that gave me a bit of relief.

The devil sweetly tortured me with suicide. His sharp tongue was like fire in my ear. The voices drowned all reasoning in my mind.

“You’re too far from God,” the evil creature whispered to me. “Look at all you’ve done. He’s not coming back to you. You have to go to Him.”

I was intrigued. For the first time in months, I had some hope.

“You can’t handle these things anymore. God wants to take away your burdens. You have to go to Heaven and be with Him. Then, you will see Him. No more stress. No more pain. Just Heaven. You are saved. When you die, you’ll go straight there. It’s time.”

Tears running down my cheeks, I smiled…completely deceived.

I wrote suicide letters my mind on one thing: Heaven. I secured a bottle of sleeping pills and took them. As I lay in bed waiting for my home-going, I turned to my nightstand and saw the envelopes with my children’s names on them.

No, I thought. I can’t do this. God doesn’t want me to do this.

I sat up in my bed and called a friend. I confessed my sin, crying so loud he could barely understand me. We prayed and prayed. But I fell asleep.

I spent four days in a hospital. When I came home, my depression was still there. I was barely able to get out of bed. I still could not pray. I was miserable. The last thing I wanted to do was to bother my friends with my troubles. But I was tired of being tired.

I called one of my best friends and shared everything. God bless her. She gave me the solution that was so simple, so sweet.

“Get up right now,” she demanded in only a way she could.

I obeyed.

“You will not lay in that bed. You will not let this defeat you. I want you to call on the name of Jesus. Do it now.”

So I did. We recited ‘Jesus’ over and over again. It was a quiet call at first. Before I knew it, my voice grew louder and louder. My best friend was off of the phone but I didn’t notice. I continued to call Jesus. On my knees, I prayed and begged for help.

There’s an army rising up.
To break every chain, break every chain, break every chain.

Yes, my friend! Praise God that army was rising up and ready to rescue me!

I felt better. Everyday, I fell out of bed and on my knees in prayer. God had sent that army down just for me. My strength returned. Laughter, joy and love was back in my life.

God said to me “I will never leave you.”

And He never did. I had forgotten that God cannot and will not forsake us, regardless of how far away we feel we have strayed.

Matthew 28:20 … and, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen.

I had lost my way, feeling hopeless and without love. I allowed the enemy to nearly erase me. But the beautiful thing to remember is that Jesus conquered all death on the cross. Death is sin. Had I killed myself, I would have been guilty of sin and rejecting the sacrifice of God.

Beloved, we have to remember that there is great incomprehensible power in the name of JESUS. We all take this for granted but should not. I am a witness to that power. It is indescribable what happened to me just by calling the name of JESUS. That spirit, that chain of depression was broken with that sweet simple utterance of His name.

Jesus.

2 Chronicles 7:14
14 If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.

I am back in the loving arms of my Father, remembering always, my Holy place in the body of Christ. The chains are broken. Can you hear them falling? Can you hear the army of love charging the enemy to rescue you too?

Praise the Lord! I am in love. And it has never felt so good.

Grace and peace,
Blessings and love!

Remember Your Purpose

Tags

Afterlife, Bible, Christ, christianity, gospel, Heaven, Jesus Christ, lifestyle, Love, religion, Saved

What would happen if all of the churches closed their doors for one Sunday and went out to minister to people just as Jesus and all of his disciples ministered? Who are we to tell people to come to us? Why can’t we go to them?

Yes, it is good to fellowship with people with your beliefs. But bond together in brotherly love and not vain glory. What good is it to have “church” and only “minister” to the same people over and over?

What about Monique, a self confessed prostitute with several children? When she was told that Jesus loves her, all she could do was fight back tears. “I only hear ‘I love you’ from my children. They gotta love me. I’m they momma.” Monique wants to experience God’s love but everyone in her neighborhood knows her occupation. She can’t go to the church. They’ll judge her.
Pam was on the Homecoming Court in high school. She made it to graduation but married a man who beat her. She lost sight in her left eye. She keeps to herself, avoiding crowds at all cost.

Shirley has always been talkative and quick to voice her opinion about almost everything. When asked to talk about herself, she shuts down. In her 52 years on this earth, she has spent 27 of them going in and coming out of mental institutions. Do you know Jesus, Shirley? “Yeah, he’s that white man in the picture.”

How do we get to these people if we are sitting in our buildings week after week basking in our own vain glory? We call it praising God…giving God the glory. Really? How does God get the glory from you obtaining yet another title from your church? What glory does God receive by you calling yourself ‘Doctor’ or ‘Bishop’ or ‘Evangelist’? Especially when you sit on your title after you’ve earned it.

You are in charge of this program and that in your church. You can raise this much money for this department and that. Your congregation adores you. Your church organization respects you and sends you across the world to annual conventions and meetings.

Meanwhile, Pam, Shirley and Monique die unsaved and unaware that “by grace through faith” (Eph. 2:8-9) they could have been saved. They could have experienced a love greater than no other.

What do you plan to say to our Father on judgment day? What will you tell Him when he asks:

“They died on your watch. Where were you?”

“Lord, I was in church.”

My lovely brothers and sisters, sealed unto the day of redemption, called by Christ himself. Let’s not be selfish. Let’s take our honored position and share the good news.

Mark 16:15
And he said unto them, Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature.

Fearless

Tags

Afterlife, Bible, christianity, church, Death, Encouragement, faith, God, Heaven, Jesus Christ, Love

Is it hard to believe that Christians are still being persecuted and slaughtered around the world just for wanting to worship God? It’s one of those facts that is in the back of my mind because we live in such a “free” society. We can pretty much do as we please and worship a flower if we wish. (That little trend is going around but that’s a different blog.). We can spend millions of dollars on buildings and décor if we choose. Some of us take the Lord’s name in vain without thought. Meanwhile all around the globe we have brothers and sisters in Christ who are literally dying to just to say the name of Jesus Christ out loud.

It made me wonder what gave them that strength and that courage to face the penalty of death. I’m sure there is some fear. After all, the flesh is weak even though the Spirit is willing. But what kind of faith does it take for these people to face persecution every day? From where does the courage come?

The hope of glory. The assurance that one day they will be united with God our Father, the king of all kings.

Now, I can admit that if I were in the shoes of the persecuted I would probably go to my death kicking and screaming out of fear of the pain. However, like so many courageous heroes of the Bible and today, I have no fear of death itself.

 

The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid? Psalms 27:1

I’m short and petite some have even called me “tiny” and that’s okay. That being said some ask me how can I walk up to homeless people in empty corners and give them things. Aren’t you scared they’re going to grab you? Rob you? Kill you? Nope. I don’t let much really scare me anymore. I can say with confidence I don’t fear death itself. I do fear leaving my children before they are ready to be on their own. No one looks forward to the pain that may be associated with the death. Aside from that I’m ready. Are you?

Those of us who are in Christ know and understand who we are. We know that Jesus Christ conquered death. Our “death” is nothing more than a much needed nap until we are awakened by our Father to go home to Heaven. We shouldn’t fear death nor life for that matter.

We are not given a spirit of fear but of power, love and sound mind (2 Timothy 1:7).

God has left us the ultimate legacy to pass down the gospel in order to build the body. What a privilege! What an honor! Nothing should get int the way of our honored task of building the body of Christ.

Paul was one of the most abused disciples in the Bible. He was beaten repeatedly and left for dead. He was rejected by his own people and jailed for preaching the gospel of the grace of God to all men. But even in prison, he preached, his faith unwavering.

 Phil.1:28-30

28 And in nothing terrified by your adversaries: which is to them an evident token of perdition, but to you of salvation, and that of God. 29 For unto you it is given in the behalf of Christ, not only to believe on him, but also to suffer for his sake; 30 Having the same conflict which ye saw in me, and now hear to be in me.

Courageous.

What kept him going?

The same Holy Spirit that dwelled in Paul, also lives in each of us who are saved. This and that Holy promise of one day being with the Lord. Paul constantly encouraged Christians to focus on what is to come and not what they would have to endure. Faithful and fearless until the very end of his earthly life, Paul’s last words are just as encouraging those the body of Christ. Could we quote these words on our death bed and be justified in saying it?

 2 Timothy 4:7-8

7 I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith: 8 Henceforth there is laid up for me a crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, shall give me at that day: and not to me only, but unto all them also that love his appearing.

Secrets, Lies and Confessions: Getting Your Focus Back

A few nights ago, I had a very strange yet enlightening experience. I may be as weird as weird can get being the dirty little freak that I am (see previous article To Thine Own Faith Be True), but this feeling, this aha moment took the cake.

I started to think about the deaths in my family this year. When death that close happens to us, it always make us temporarily re-examine our lives. I began to think about mine. I thought about what I have done and not done, my plans, my accomplishments and my failures. The things that I am most proud of and known for made me smile. Then came to cloud of recent actions and I cried. Suddenly, I had the overwhelming need and desire to just cry. I didn’t know why. I just suddenly felt overwhelmed and needed to let it out. I called one of my best friends and kept him up for hours just spilling my guts (thanks BJ). Afterward, I felt better having given my confession and received care. But there was still work to do. I realized that I have been living a lie. My lie had manifested into a barrier between me and my Father.

Have you ever met someone who seemed to have it all together? They seemed to have all of the answers, no real issues and just content. How did you feel about that person? Did you envy them? Despise them? Did you just have no care at all?

We all know that people who seem to have it together hardly do. These are the people who are good at wearing the mask of deception. And most of the time, the only person they ever truly deceive, is themselves.

I don’t mind confessing my sins to you. I’m an open book. You only have to ask. This information, however, I share freely with you. I hope it helps someone. As it is beginning to help me.

My strange and enlightening experience was the realization that in my efforts to wear my pretty little mask of deceitful perfection, I had begun to loose focus of what is important and what is true.

Now I am content in most areas of my life. I know my salvation is secure (Ephesian 2:8-9). I have no fear of death aside from the pain that may accompany it. I am confident that I am good at what I do professionally. I’m a great mom. I’m a great friend. I’m the one who is there for everybody. I’m the one who tells her secrets and her fears to no one. That is my mask. I need no one. I am content. Keep in mind this mask serves its purpose. It hides and conceals. We all know that nothing concealed can be healed.

This mask of mine had begun to suffocate me. So I searched for a means to get air without of course revealing my true self. And my quest led me down paths that I did not belong. My journey was sidetracked and I lost sight of my true goal in life: spreading the gospel.

Romans 8:5 For they that are after the flesh do mind the things of the flesh; but they that are after the Spirit the things of the Spirit.

My Bible study begin to decrease. My daily reminder to read my Bible App went ignored often. Instead, I turned to texting friends and chatting on the phone. My outreach efforts were replaced with work and social gathering. Rarely was there a true discussion about the Lord. I replaced my relationship with God with desires of my flesh, desire that I denied for so long because hey, I was wearing the mask. I was content and didn’t need anything or anyone. Or so I wanted everyone to believe. But not only did most people did not buy it more importantly, the enemy did not buy it. And he took that weakness of mine and capitalized on it. My desire became my god. Yes, god with a little ‘g”. Anything that comes before our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ becomes just that. Amen?

Romans 1:21 Because that, when they knew God, they glorified him not as God, neither were thankful; but became vain in their imaginations, and their foolish heart was darkened.

So, I had lost focus. But I had not realized it yet. That my brothers and sisters is a dangerous state. Anything could happen because your connection with the Father is limited.

So my crying and nashing of teeth session with my friend was my wake up call. Hello! To ignore the Holy Spirit is to place yourself in such danger.

When we loose focus, we turn from God. When we turn from God, we turn to other gods. The new “god” could be your job, your property or even a person. Anything that fills your desire more than the Lord Jesus Christ, is your new god.

How do we regain our focus? How do we get back on track? Personally, I remind myself of the unthinkable sacrifice that was made for me. I remind myself that it is selfish to take such a sacrifice for granted.

1 Peter 3:18 For Christ also hath once suffered for sins, the just for the unjust, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh, but quickened by the Spirit:

We do not take those we love for granted. If we truly love God, we accept and cherish all He has done. We only need to look around to see that this present and cruel world will not be around much longer. Time, as the recent deaths in my family reminded me, is not on our side. It is imperative that we try to stay focus on our charge. We have the most important job, teaching the gospel that Christ died for our sins and nothing can be done to earn this free gift. Our faith is important. Our faith must be strong.

Col. 2:6-8 Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him, rooted and built up in him and established in the faith, just as you were taught, abounding in thanksgiving. See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ.

Instead of focusing on the spoils of this present world (and I know it is a daily struggle), we try to keep our minds and hearts on the promise that one day very soon, we will be home in heaven.

Matthew 6:33 But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

With our minds on heavenly places, we focus on our mission, we pursue our goal to increase our family. Sure its easy to become distracted. This world is filed with distractions. Several semi-sweet temptations have come my way. Some I have been able to evade, others not so much. But these detractors make us loose sight of why we’re her in the first place. Loosing focus ultimately separates us from God. Now this has nothing to do with salvation. We are sealed. But it does not mean that we are not capable of falling short or getting off track. In fact, I would say that as members of the body of Christ, we are more often provoked into falling into the trap of temptation. What better audience for the enemy to target than those who know the truth, those who faith is strong and those who have been given the power and the charge to bring others too the Father.

Phil 4:8

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.